INTELLECTUAL ORGASM & THE ESSENCE OF A WOMAN

[Danny C. Sillada]

Originally published at Manila Bulletin as “Intellectual Stimulation & the Essence of a Woman (The Artist Tribute to Women)", text and arworks by Danny C. Sillada, Page F1, Lifestyle Section (Art & Living), July 7, 2008.

"One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman."-
Simone de Beauvoir, Second Sex

How many men have failed to understand a woman, not only in the context of emotional and sexual affirmation, but also on the level of intellectual stimulation that a woman of passion and reason craves and desires?

Generally, a woman can be attracted to a man because of his looks and physical appearance. However, the moment he speaks, he will either arouse her curiosity or bore her to death.

She may intermittently yawn or twirl her hair with her finger as a sign of discontent in front of a boring or insensitive person. But when a woman’s blood rushes toward her cheeks, and her eyes glow with indescribable radiance, it is an inevitable sign that she is at the peak of her intellectual and emotional experience.

So what really does a woman need and desire in a man, and what brings her to the fullest experience of her femininity as a woman?

A good lover does not necessarily need an Adonis' physique or material possessions to impress a woman – but wit, passion and humor – a rational mind and a sensitive heart to stimulate the recesses of her soul.

To affirm a woman's existence is not only to assuage her sensual and emotional needs and longings, but also to stimulate the intellectual resonance of her body and soul. Some women call it “Intellectual Orgasm” while others call it “Intellectual Stimulation”.

Intellectual Orgasm is to bring the woman to the heights of her femininity by being loved and adored with passion and reason, enduring the passing of time or season. A man’s love for a woman must be rational; he must see through the woman’s soul her value and beauty in relation to his quest for life and meaning.

A rational man must recognize her indispensable role in conceiving and delivering humanity into this world. Because every woman, regardless of her status in life or in the society, is the man’s identity of who he was, who he is and who he will be. Man exists because of a woman and she becomes a woman because of him.

Being borne out of a woman, he can only reciprocate that sublime responsibility of “conceiving, birthing and nurturing” humanity by treating every woman with respect and compassion. He has to make her feel as though she is like the air that he breathes or the light that beckons in his solitude, because she is the completion of what he is and what he is going to become.

For every man, there is always a woman who laughs and cries with him in times of joy or sorrow, victory or defeat, happiness or desolation. She is there not only to console or to listen, but also to nurse and bandage the wounds of his defiled dreams and existence.

And like any man, a woman has her own conquest too and her conquest is to be constantly desired and adored rather than taken for granted when youth and physical beauty wilt away.

She is not a functional object to be used; neither is she the repository of man’s lust and desire to be discarded when she is no longer attractive or exploitable. For every woman – whoever or whatever she is – deserves respect whether she is a prostitute, mentally-challenged or a factory worker.

Conversely, her dignity as a woman does not diminish; neither does it fade away, under any circumstances. She may be broken, abused or violated, but she is always capable of healing, nurturing and finding herself again like a wild flower that blossoms even in harsh conditions. She is what she is – mystically whole and integral – because, after all, she is perfectly designed as a WOMAN to bring and nurture humanity in this world.

As a man of passion and reason, he must rise above her physical appearance and see through her delicate soul the quintessential beauty of a woman. It is an eye, for instance, of seeing the beauty of a female figure working in the farm with sun-baked skin or a destitute mother carrying her child along the busy street or a native lass planting rice in the mountain.

Her essence as a woman transcends beyond space and time and, like a seasoned wine, the older she gets the more she defines and completes her metaphysical meaning as a woman. The more she advances in her age the more she possesses an aura of beauty and elegance beyond the physical realms. She becomes the symbol of love, humanity and beauty that a man must constantly esteem and desire with passion and reason.

Rational man that he is, he must continuously adore his woman like a mystical goddess, as ineffable and desirable as a noble princess by showing not only how he speaks with gentility and enthusiasm, but also how he talks and listens with fervor and compassion.

EVERY WOMAN IS EQUAL TO A MAN: what he desires is what she equally desires in her own way as a woman, and she desires nothing but to love and to be loved by the man whom she trusted and gave her entire life and existence.

© Danny C. Sillada

[Danny C. Sillada]

Ha ha ha, you made my day my friend. Thanks a lot and good luck to your book tour.

Danny

[Author-Poet Aberjhani]

I would say your life story has placed you in a very good position to talk about issues regarding women and I may very well quote you in a blog of my own dealing with the subject as part of a virtual book tour for one of our other members.

Aberjhani

[Danny C. Sillada]

Hi to everyone, thanks a lot for your overwhelming response and comment to the this post, I highly appreciate it.

Particularly, I would like to thank Aberjhani. I 'm still editing my manuscripts (books) for publication.

As an artist and writer, women have played a very important role in my life. I grew up with my women relatives and friends; I was also raised by a woman (my mom) without my father (he died when I was very young).

When I entered the seminary to study priesthood, my apostolate was to counsel single parents, prostitutes, battered women and those victims of human rights. Even though I already left my vocation, still advocate equal rights and opportunity for women especially in my culture in Mindanao, which is mixed with Lumad (ethnic groups), Christians and Muslims.

Thanks again and my best wishes to all.

Peace & love,

Danny

I may not be in a position to talk about the issue on women, but my experience with them enlivined and nurtured my passion for my art and my life in general.

[Robby Baby (Poet of Amour)]

There is too much going on, a "hyper analysis" of what is woman and what is man, but I think we all instinctually know what those essences are, and a simple truth is that we should treat each other with dignity, and be passionate and loving to each other when we are in the realm of love :)

[Cendrine Marrouat]

I have to agree with Aberjhani. Even though some people may question the validity of what you wrote, there is something beautiful about this essay that honours the woman I am.

[Author-Poet Aberjhani]

Thank you Friend Danny for posting this great essay here at CTI. Man, that title rocks me every time I read it :-)

I have one group of “womanist” friends who would debate with you the ideas expressed here that a woman’s identity or destiny is any way dependent on a man, yet another group that would very loudly applaud your exquisite presentation of the metaphysical dynamics of men and women’s mutually shared destinies. I doubt anyone, however, would question for a moment the beauty of the passion, clarity, and integrity that you bring to the subject. I am now more curious than ever to check out your books in different genres when they become available.

Aberjhani

[Robby Baby (Poet of Amour)]

I'd primp and preen my hair, but I am pretty much shaven LOL I'll just use the lure of my eyes! hee hee.

There are lots of signals, yes, but, of course, its good to try to feel the general vibe too, you don't want to overanalyze such things. There are always "general signals" of course.

[Cendrine Marrouat]

Wow! What a piece! I love it! I was riveted and pleased. It was phenomenal!

[Romantic Poetess]

yes actually primping our hair (twisting/touching/flipping) is sub consciously a flirt to the male we give eye contact towards & especially if we are leaning in towards him :)

[Robby Baby (Poet of Amour)]

oooooo....saw this post, riveted by the title! I've noticed how women are more intellectual in their attraction sometimes. They seem to have an strong intellectual space in regards to becoming attracted to a guy, becoming aroused by their words, what they do.

I really liked what you said about women not to be discarded. There are too many "players" out there BLECH. They may get sex, but in the end, never love, and I think many of them realize they want love when they turn 50 and have a midlife crisis LOL

Thanks for the fascinating post! It was fascinating to read! I've heard that about the hair, too by the way. Though it seems that there is a coy manner in which they do that too, that conveys interest.